We are indeed still alive

No one seem's to understand the stress i've been going through for a while now. The machine that was able to smash atom's to re-create the big bang. Good god i was freaking out! I had read into it, and tons of well known and established scientists had theories that the machine may actually cause a black hole and implode the earther, thus distroying our universe as we know it. lol. SO, when they ran the experiment today i was happy to still be alive, i almost cried actually...mainly bc i was so far away from my bio family, and there are tons of things i haven't bought yet that i want to get and play with before mah ass goes 6 feet under.

Speaking on the note of death, my sister Bethany wants to be mummified...like, organs taken out and shit like that, and apparently, it's legal in Florida...why Florida? i don't know. One of my mom's (the little mom lesbian) wants to be put out on some hill for animals to pick at so she can be one with Nature (yeah, my family is full of dun gone crazies). For me, i don't know quite yet. I know i have an last will of testimony, since my little sister died and no one knew what to do, and i can't remember for the love of me what the hell i had put down O_o. For Sure, that if it came to life support, i wanted to stay on life support for at least 10 months...then i'm not sure what happen's after that O_o.

Working at United Health Care is great...but i'm having issues working. We Migrated a huge universal system this week, and all our old system for processing things are now outdated, and can only be used as reference tools for the new system...and well, the new system is crap, there are tons of gliches and issues...it blows.

I just feel so...left out-type feeling. I'm spending the last few months of my teenage years in this coffin cube. And once i turn 20, the few things i have to look foreward too is turning 21, kids, house, speedboat, retirement, and then death. (argh)

I hope Kyle and Jeremy are at my apartment tonight, i don't want to be sober, lol.